Blame it on the Weatherman
by LittleMaggie
Summary: Draco has had enough of life.Something had led him to a paranoia,a horrible psychological stage-but what?And who's out to comfort him?Will she succeed?D/Hr. Joint effort w/friend Caroline;Songfic;Pyschological Drama. Ch. 7 UP!Glad ff.net is up again.
1. Tears are in my eyes, empty like my hear...

****

Note: This was written between me and my friend, and the song used is "Blame it on the Weatherman" by B*Witched. I am hoping that you like it. I do not own Harry Potter nor does my friend. J 

Blame it on the Weatherman

It was a cold and drizzly day, and once the thick spiraling sheets of rain subsided to a lighter mist of rain, Draco Malfoy put on his warm winter robes, a Slytherin scarf, and two silver mittens. He wore no hat, for he figured it would feel good to feel the rain falling onto his head for once. He wanted to escape Hogwarts for just a while, to escape everything that haunted him inside.

  
_It's just one more day  
No one said   
There would be rain again  
Won't blame it on myself  
I'll blame it on the weatherman  
Get away for a while  
Here I amount on my own again  
Won't blame it on myself   
I'll blame it on the weatherman_

Pressing the collar of his robes closer around himself, trying hard not to bump into anyone on the way out, Draco hurriedly rushed past the tall doors and then into the rain. The cold water didn't really matter to him – it was just another small distraction, and it was the big picture that mattered to him. Draco closed his eyes as the wind blew a gust of rain into them. His light-colored eyelashes parted and he caught sight of Harry Potter's snowy owl flying in with a parcel towards the dining area. Fair enough, that Harry would be getting a gift from someone. Everyone adored him, didn't they?

Draco paused as he wiped a tear from his left eye. _Damn you, Potter._

His footsteps quickened as he paced the Hogwarts grounds. The rain grew thicker and it roared in his ears, heavy and uncomfortable. His thoughts were stormier then the weather. _Why did Harry always get the girl? Why did he always end up with Hermione? Why don't I ever have anyone?_

Draco knew the treason why – his father had molded an image, a form he had to fill, and if he didn't, he'd literally be abandoned by the family. Draco Malfoy, the perfect son according to Lucius Malfoy – how deliciously ironic that Draco felt completely different. He felt he was **_not_** the perfect son, for though he did what his father demanded of him, he didn't want it that way.

_Hate the Muggles. Have the Dark Mark burned in your arm. Be a Death Eater. Sure, dad._

Standing on the shore  
Calling out your name  
I was here before  
I could see your face  
Only clouds will see  
Tears are in my eyes  
Empty like my heart  
Why do ya say goodbye

Draco stopped at the very break of where he would be leaving the terrain of the Quidditch fields and entering the route to Hagrid's small cottage. It was a straight path, but he wondered if he should risk it. The sky was opening up again, pouring hatefully. Draco felt that everyone was saying goodbye to him, that Hogwarts was silently waving to him from the distance. _If they find me dead in the forest, they'll assume it was the werewolves. Didn't Dumbledore say the forest held a slow and painful death? _

Draco reached into his pocket and pulled out the switchblade. Death would be slow and painful with this. A stab in a lucky place would drain him of blood, and a quick spell in the meantime could rearrange his scars to make it look like an animal mauling. _Lucky me._

The rain goes on (on and on again)

The rain goes on (on and on again)   
  
Alone I can hear  
Hear our song  
Playing for me again  
Won't blame it on myself  
Just blame it on the weatherman

" I'll just say the weather influenced me. Took a walk. That's it. Took a walk to get out of stinking Hogwarts, and then an animal mauled me. There." Draco yanked the switchblade through the air. It swished pleasantly – death was going to be sweet. _They didn't tell me that it would rain on my death day. The paper was wrong. I thought at least it would be sunny. _

He looked up in the torn sky, rain pouring down even heavier.

__

Maybe it's too late  
Maybe it's too late to try again  
Maybe I can pray  
Maybe I can wait  
Maybe I can blame it on the weatherman

He sighed. It was going to be now or never. Kill himself now, who cares if it is nice or not? You're dead or at least good as dead, anyway. He brought the blade down on his wrist, but before he could make the cut, he heard a voice behind him:

" Draco? What are you doing!?"

He turned. _Hermione?_


	2. Blaming it

Author's Note: We do not own Harry Potter!

Chapter 2

"Draco? What are you doing?" 

Draco turned around. _Hermione?_

There stood the dark rainy figure of Hermione. The sudden sound of her voice made him jump and the switchblade dug harshly into his skin. He bit his lip to keep from crying out. 

"What are you doing out here?" she asked again, "It's past curfew, you should get inside."

"So should you. If it's past my curfew, it's past yours. What are you doing out here?" He replied, quickly covering his wrist.

__

No one said   
There would be rain again  
Won't blame it on myself

He could feel the blood run down his wrist and start to seep through his robes.

Hermione shook her head, the rain plastering the dark curls to her forehead. Steady raindrops seeped down the sides of her cheeks and into her collar. She replied honestly: "I'm just running these spare Quidditch things to Hagrid. They're from Dumbledore. You should really head on inside. Its pouring down out here, incase you haven't noticed."

Draco turned away and sneered angrily, "I've noticed. Go on Mudblood, do your little job. Leave me in peace why don't you?" His blonde hair fluttered down loosely, about a centimeter from his earlobes. Hermione didn't notice it was so shiny and long the way he always pulled it back in a slick hairdo.

__

Get away for a while  
Here I amount on my own again  
Won't blame it on myself   
I'll blame it on the weatherman

Draco could feel a lump rise in his throat. _Don't worry, it'll be over in a little. For all I know, no one will even notice._ The rain ran down his face… _or were those tears_? He couldn't tell anymore. Everything was running together, like the tears and rainwater on his cheeks. Everything was blurry.

His eyes narrowed hatefully. _What was **she**_ _staring at? This is my business! _" Well? Go dump your stupid Quidditch supplies at the giant's house and go!" His voice cracked. "Go on, Mudblood!" He spoke sharply.

__

  
I was here before  
I could see your face  
Only clouds will see  
Tears are in my eyes  
Empty like my heart

"What's that in your hand?" Hermione asked. 

Draco snapped the blade shut with his palm. It dug into his skin again. Fresh red blood ran freely, a red wine of life that stung oddly in the pouring rain. 

"Draco!" Hermione cried. "Draco, come on. Come on, follow me, I will take you to Hagrid's to get that cleaned up. Come on!"

__

Were Mudbloods all so dense? I want to be alone! Draco shoved her outstretched arm away. A bright smear of blood appeared on her Gryffindor cloak. His fists tightened even more on the blade and he shouted: "No!," crying harder as more blood splashed to the ground and the pain became more intense. 

"Come on, Draco," Hermione wasn't giving up. Calling names and shouting was the first line of defense, something she read in _The Wizard's Handbook of Psychology. _

He turned his back to her. 

__

Maybe it's too late to try again  
Maybe I can pray  
Maybe I can wait

"Draco! Come on." He turned back to her again. She could see the pain and anger in his eyes. "Draco, come on, you're scaring me, please come on!" 

__

  
I guess I'll… I'll blame it on the weatherman

Draco looked more or less unwilling to budge. Instead, he spoke: " It's just the weather. I was just - - the house was too stuffy… a walk in the woods…" 

" Bullshit. You're not supposed to be out here." Hermione put her hands on her hips. " You're going to get an infection – you're bleeding all over. Did you cut yourself?"

Draco slowly unclenched his fist. A blood-spattered knife gave wake to a gruesome slash across his fingers and then vertically across his palm. It was deep and dirty and the rainwater pooled in his hand as he cupped it in this way, readying to infect the newly-opened skin. He had never worked physically with his hands; they possessed an unusual softness to them very much unlike Harry's or Ron's. The terrible cut was a new thing to them.

She gasped. " Hagrid will have to clean this up for you!"

~*~

A/n: What will happen next? REVIEW! Bwa ha ha!


	3. A Confession 1

Author's Note: We do not own Harry Potter! ****

Chapter 3

She gasped. " Hagrid will have to clean this up for you!"

" It's fine." He replied, but allowed her to grab his sleeve and then pull him towards Hagrid's hut. It didn't really matter, the fact that she cared enough to steer him towards some help. The moment that stupid giant would let him go, he decided to slip outside, and once there, he planned to get his plan carried out. It wasn't so hard, after all. _Stupid Granger, think you could comfort me? It's too far from that._

Hermione let go of his sleeve though, and said, matter-of-factly: " If I'm going to pull you all the way there, I might as well give up." She was flushed, because it was a bit of weight to drag a bag of Quidditch supplies **_and_** him. 

Draco thought she looked rather pretty that way, her hair scattered around the way it was; then his mind surfaced another thought, as if a leaf floating on the surface of a lake: _Father says Mudbloods can't be beautiful. They're barely any better then Muggles, for Merlin's sake!_

" You don't know the scare you gave me." She scolded, her eyebrows drawing tightly in a frown. " I saw you standing there, just on the verge of entering the forest. I knew I had to say something. I didn't think it would be **_you,_** of all people." _She's rambling_, Draco analyzed. _Why wouldn't it be me?_

Standing on the shore  
Calling out your name  
I was here before  
I could see your face

" What did you think you were doing, running around out here with a knife in your hand?" She asked.

__

I wanted a painful death. It sounded thrilling. Who cares about a quick death like **Avada Kedavra**? That doesn't scare me anymore. Draco had many words in his mind but he simply replied, in a mumble: " … er… thought I'd cut one of those forest Stink Mushrooms and put it in Potter's bag."

Hermione shook her head. " Typical of you." She sounded cold as she spoke these words, almost as if she didn't entirely enjoy knowing Draco's plan.

__

Of course she wouldn't. Draco slowly slid the knife into the pocket of his robes and then rubbed his hands together, trying to wash them in the rain. They neared Hagrid's hut, and when it's dark, short and squat figure appeared before them, Hermione said: "I'll knock on the door. I don't think he'd bother opening the door for you."

Draco admitted to himself that this was reasonably true, but still took slight offense.

Hermione rapped on the door and waited patiently.

" Comin'." Hagrid's voice rang out from inside. He opened the door a crack and a thin channel of light was thrown over Hermione. He could see nothing else. " Brought th' Quidditch supplies, did ya?" He motioned with his large hand for her to slip inside. "C'min, c'min."

Hermione slowly slipped inside, then motioned at the doorway.

" Want me to carry 'em?" Hagrid asked.

She shook her head. " I have someone else here."

Hagrid burst the door open: " 'Arry? Ron?" His eyes fell upon Draco Malfoy and his smile was erased entirely. " Think yer bein' funny, do ya?" He asked the boy. " What've ya done wit' 'Arry now? Dumbledore's always sendin' these kids ter me, I tell ya…"

Draco reached out his hand, not bothering to answer the giant man. He figured his cut would speak for itself.

__

No one said   
There would be rain again  
Won't blame it on myself

" I didn't do it myself." He immediately said. " Well, not on purpose, anyway. I was just holding a knife, and then…" He didn't know how to continue the lie, so he simply gave an excuse. " It was raining, I figured the rain would just wash it off, but then she came along and insisted I came to you."

" Thank yer lucky stars Hermione did what she did." Hagrid pushed Draco inside, though a bit gently. " C'min too, then."

Draco sat down in the giant sofa-chair, his body nearly sinking entirely into it.

" Not on my chair, y'don't. Ya wouldn't know the troub'l tah get bloodstains outta it." Hagrid motioned to a stiff wooden bench propped up against the wall instead.

" Just fix it here." Draco said. He wasn't about to go sitting on hard benches. _Wait until Father hears of this._ His stomach tightened just then. _My Father **won't** hear of this, though… well, unless Hagrid or Granger tells him._

Hagrid took a taut white roll of gauze out of a cabinet and then brought it over to Draco.

" Is it bad?" Hermione asked.

" Not too bad." Hagrid slowly washed the cut out. " Can't do magic, now, can I? Hermione, ya wouldn't mind castin' a quick healin' charm on this so it could scab o'er a bit?"

Hermione nodded and knelt down beside Draco. She positioned her wand over the cut and tried to recollect the spell she picked up from Madame Pomfrey in the hospital wing. " Healei Scasponus!" The entire cut seemed to glow and then the blood clotted instantly.

Hagrid wrapped the gauze around the cut and then said: " This ain't no accidental cut, Mister Malfoy." He tapped at the gauze. "Yer mistaken tah think that you'd fool me. I've seen cuts all my life an' I can tell the difference by now. So, tell us the real story, if y'd rather not spell it out in Dumbledore's office instead."

Draco swallowed hard. His throat felt dry and raspy all of a sudden. _Do I tell them? If I get stuck in Dumbledore's office, he might even put the Truth spell on me. Then I won't be out of Madame Pomfrey's until they brainwash me into a life-loving freak again. _A paranoia almost overcame him.

__

Maybe it's too late  
Maybe it's too late to try again

It was too late, after all; he'd made his mind up. To avoid other consequences, Draco began to explain what led him to this state.

~*~

Author's Note: We'll continue with more reviews! Thank you all that reviewed! 


	4. A Confession 2

Author's Note: We do not own Harry Potter!

****
    
    Chapter 4

It was too late, after all; he'd made his mind up. To avoid other consequences, Draco began to explain what led him to this state. 

He leaned his body forwards so as not to appear too comfortable with his coming speech. His throat dry with emotion, he began: "Ever since I was little, I'd… I'd do _anything _to please my father. When I was little, he gave me a lot of things, he'd always just push all these great toys on me. I grew up in a fucking mansion!" He looked up and saw the stricken look on Hagrid's face at the mentioning of a swear word. Draco made a brief shrug with his shoulders, hoping it made up in apology in some way. " But - - as he bought me over with false affection, he taught me."

" Taught you… what?" Hermione asked, softly.

Draco's eyes grew wild with pain. He cited, in a voice that proved that the words he spoke were pushed into him mechanically through a slow process of brain-washing: " There is no evil. There is no good. There is only power – and those who are strong enough to seek it. We, Malfoys, are strong, we will seek power. Power is with the Dark Lord, our Lord."

A shiver ran down Hermione's spine.

" He told me that every day. It became a bit of a song between my father and me. He'd oftentimes coo it to me over my crib when I was little, even. I still remember his voice." Draco looked down at the crisp white bandages wrapping airily around his hand.

Echoes of Lucius's voice, slimy and cold, filled with a masked hatred like the croak of a caged vulture, seemed to float through the minds of all three people present in Hagrid's hut. Draco let out a shuddering sigh and whispered: " I believed his words when he spoke to me… but soon, I could hear his voice even when I was alone…"

Alone I can hear  
Hear our song  
Playing for me again

" Everything I've ever said and done was based on what he taught me. From my hatred of Mudbloods – usually the weakest ones, they don't want to join the Dark Lord – to the hatred towards Muggles – they don't even know who the Dark Lord is! – it all stemmed from my father." Malfoy let out a dry laugh. " Can you imagine me when I went to day care with a few five-year-olds my age? While they spoke of their father's jobs or exclaimed about what they want to be when they grow up, I sat in the corner of the room sketching the Dark Mark on my palm, waiting for the day I could kill someone for the Dark Lord."

Hermione's breath came in and out of her breast quicker now, almost as if she were suffocating. She had often read about the way the Dark Lord's supporters raised their children's morals solely based on misinterpreted quotes of power and good and evil, yet hearing it first-source was beyond her comprehension.

" … And I did." Draco's voice broke and he looked ready to sob. " I did kill someone."

Hagrid cleared his throat uncomfortably. " 'Ere's no sense to that. When? There wasn't any report in the news 'bout any killin' goin' on!"

" Having the high position in the Ministry as he has, my Father erased all track of it. I can still remember it like it was yesterday – late in the summer of the fourth year, he finally took me to a meeting of the Death Eaters. There, they had an official initiation for the members. I had the Dark Mark burned into my skin then." Draco paused only to lower the shoulder of his robe. Glistening high upon his arm was the Dark Mark. Hagrid closed his eyes in fright and Hermione had to look away. The Dark Mark was a cursed mark, any man who bore it was doomed if he were caught with it amongst wizards like Dumbledore. 

" There was a betrayer amongst us, and my father pointed him out. Aerus Smits, a skinny and fumbling man about twenty… he was leaking information out slowly about the members of the Death Eaters. My father was never ready to release any news of the Dark Lord's uprisings and our long, jagged, bitter past." Draco spoke of Death Eaters as 'us', always referring to himself as part of them. He was one now, then, after all.

__

Get away for a while  
Here I amount on my own again  
Won't blame it on myself   
I'll blame it on the weatherman

How can I tell them? How can I possibly tell them what I did? Draco's hands shook before he could continue, releasing a heavy breath that shook his body. " I - - I was the one that my father instructed to execute Smits. I did the Avada Kedavra on him. I know how to use it – it's a must-know spell in a Death Eater's book, after all." 

Hermione could now understand why Draco didn't kill himself with Avada Kedavra. Psychologically, Draco would choose a painful death unlike the one he inflicted upon the man he killed. Not that the spell wasn't painful, but it was definitely a quicker death.

" I'm afraid." Draco whispered all of a sudden. A cold cloud of breath appeared before his mouth. " I'm afraid." He rocked back and forth, his fingers clenching and unclenching. " They'll find out I told you. My father will kill me. He told me if I ever, _ever_ betray our family, he'll dispose of me. I'd rather kill myself then blemish the Malfoy name." He turned wildly, suddenly grasping his knife again. 

Hermione and Hagrid shot up to their feet, crying out in unison: " Don't do it!" Then, they sat down again when they saw that Draco simply wanted to hold the blade, a last vestige of comfort and protection from the outside world.

" They'll kill you, too, if they find out you know." Draco's nostrils flared. Then, he continued his story: " … I realized soon enough that I didn't really feel the same way my father did about things. He was on a high when he killed, almost as if he derived pleasure from it. I grieved for days after I killed Smits." He stopped to wipe a tear from his left eye for it had finally fallen. Then, he added: " I pretended to love it, but I didn't embrace it any longer. Pretty soon, I was just living a lie."

Hermione nodded, trying to show understanding.

" I couldn't tell my father that I didn't support his ideas. That would be like a son renouncing his family name; it was the Malfoy way of life!" Draco finally added, in a low and frightening voice: " I decided that if I were to live a lie, I should die a lie." He motioned with his chin at the knife in his hand. " It was an easy death, Hermione, a low and easy death that, in a simple spell, could be made to look like an accident… animal mauling, even… _anything_!"

Hermione's chin quivered. " I'm so sorry for you." She looked ready to cry.

" Don't cry for me, I'm already dead." Draco replied, eerily, his luminescent blue eyes catching the bleak light from outside as he looked up.

__

Only clouds will see  
Tears are in my eyes  
Empty like my heart  
Why do ya say goodbye

~*~

Author's Note: We'll continue with more reviews! Thank you all that reviewed! 


	5. Bleeding Again

A/N- This is Caroline, enjoy! We don't own anyone! 

****

Chapter 5

" Don't cry for me, I'm already dead." Draco replied, eerily, his luminescent blue eyes catching the bleak light from outside as he looked up. Afterwards, it grew very quiet. Hagrid's voice was only a soft whisper as he said: "Y'should get some rest, I'd wager ya ain't in the best of humor."

Draco nodded, reluctant to follow orders but willing to do anything as long as it guaranteed some consolation for his feelings. He stood and sat himself down onto the couch across the room, which was a small one, but when he curled his legs up it accommodated him well. 

Soon enough, Draco fell asleep on the couch. He looked so peaceful. Yet, so cold, even hurt, the way an animal would look after it fell asleep with one leg caught in a hunter's trap. The animal would know that doom was impending, that it would meet its fate, but it was too tired to struggle with the chains of the trap at the moment.

__

'With out his usual sneer, he's even kind of cute.' Hermione thought, lining the top of her mug with her finger. _'Wait! What am I saying? That's Draco Malfoy I'm talking about_!' 

"You okay, 'Mione?" 

Hermione snapped up at the sound of her name. "What?"

"You look confused, and I ain't used t' see ya like that."

Hagrid was right, she was confused. Confused about herself, about Draco, about everything. _What would drive a person to do such a thing to someone, their own son, no less?_

Draco turned once again, he seemed to toss and turn a lot. Was it nightmares? Was it just habit? Draco turned and the Dark Mark was shown once again, his Slytherin robes sliding down so that his shoulder was bared to the audience in the room.

__

The rain goes on(on and on again)

The rain goes on(on and on again)

Hermione flinched. "I don't know, Hagrid. Its just something about that Mark that makes me scared." 

Hagrid grabbed a Gryffindor blanket and threw it to Hermione. "Go cover the little lad up, you've got a gent'lr touch."

Hermione walked over to Draco and carefully covered him up. He was cold, so cold she noticed. She looked closer at the Dark Mark. It looked permanent. It was hideous. She couldn't bear to look at it. Then she remembered fourth year.

The Quidditch game at the Cup was wonderful. Then the masked people came and they were torturing the Muggles and then she remembered how Draco acted. He had laughed, he had been so calm. He acted as if it were all a joke. _Of course, he wasn't in any danger**. **_He acted as if he was completely protected. He made fun of her, he told her that the masked lot were after Muggles and Half-Bloods. 

__

I'll blame it on the weatherman  
Get away for a while  
Here I amount on my own again  
Won't blame it on myself   
I'll blame it on the weatherman

Would Draco act that way? Hermione looked back at Draco and laughed slightly. "Wha' so funny?" 

"Nothing, Hagrid. I just never thought I'd see the day when The Great Draco Malfoy would be seen in Gryffindor colors!" She said, sitting back down across from Hagrid.

Hagrid suddenly stood, slowly brushing his mud-caked leather vest free of dust and dirt. " I ain't sure if it's the right thing ta do, but I'm gonna go speak with Dumbledore. I know he'll keep this in confidence."

Hermione frowned. " Is that such a good idea?"

Hagrid's eyes trailed towards Draco, breathing steadily beneath the Gryffindor blanket. He seemed to have settled in a more trance-like dream. " When 'Ogwarts students are in danger, Dumbledore's gotta be first t' know. A' fore anyone else does anythin', Dumbledore has to tell us how to deal with this."

Hermione nodded and then waved as Hagrid opened the door and stepped outside. " B'sides, I gotta get you both excused for the time y'were missin' and all." Hagrid added, before closing the door. A gust of wind blew a wave of rain indoors, spattering the floor.

Hermione settled back in the soft chair that Draco had previously occupied.

Suddenly there was a little moan coming from the couch. 

It was Draco. He was tossing and there was sweat matting down his blonde hair. Hermione sat near Draco. She threw off the blanket and saw Draco's wounds were bleeding again. Dark, red blood twisted down his sides, soaking his robes, which had fallen apart to reveal a crisp button-up shirt beneath.

Draco sat up quickly and looked into Hermione's brown eyes with his gray-blue ones. 

__

'He has amazing eyes.' 

__

Alone I can hear  
Hear our song  
Playing for me again

His were clouded with terror. "Hermione! I saw him… I saw him… My dad's coming. He'll kill me for telling."

A/N- Thank you for all your reviews! 


	6. Maybe I can try again

A/N- This is Maggie writing. We don't own anything/anyone/anyplace.

****

Chapter 6

__

His were clouded with terror. "Hermione! I saw him… I saw him… My dad's coming. He'll kill me for telling."

Hermione reached out and patted his hand tenderly. He flinched slightly for she skimmed the battered surface of his cuts beneath the bandages. She sighed and said: " It wasn't your father coming. It's just Hagrid."

Draco, realizing now that the burly, large figure in the doorway was in no way his father, settled back down on the couch. Hermione clicked her tongue and then said: " You tore your scabs off your hands." Her nose wrinkled. " The bandage must have snatched on it when you were sitting up." 

Draco looked bemused. " Sorry." He mumbled, and she found no trace of sarcasm in his voice.

" Don't apologize. You hurt yourself more then me." Hermione slowly unwrapped his left hand, which seemed to bleed most. She was startled to see the wound, but quickly took her wand out and healed it again. She decided not to rummage Hagrid's shelves without his permission, so she simply reused the bandages he had on before, re-wrapping them tighter this time to prevent sliding and snagging. 

Suddenly, Draco's fingers wrapped around her hand. Hermione felt her heart beating in her ears. _What's this? He's only Draco Malfoy!_

****

Standing on the shore  
Calling out your name  
I was here before  
I could see your face

" Thank you," He added: "For listening." 

She nodded with a smile on her face. " If only I could help in some way, though!"

He shook his head. " I'd rather you not."

" Why?" Hermione asked.

" You'd only get tangled up in everything. Being the… the… not pure blood you are…" He stopped to see if she took it offensively instead of just matter-of-factly. Hermione didn't seem too angered. " … my father would kill you for your involvement. He doesn't stand your type anyway, but your type interfering with the Malfoy's private family life… he wouldn't have it." Draco shook his head. "It's hopeless."

His fingers remained clenched around her hand and she wondered if she should say anything. Her blush spoke for her since he suddenly released her imprisoned hand and said: " Sorry."

" It's alright. It's normal to be afraid." She cooed.

" It isn't normal to be afraid of the things I fear." He replied. Suddenly, he tensed. The hair on his neck rippled and rose, and he whispered hotly: " Where'd Hagrid go?"

" Erm…" Hermione bit her lower lip. She didn't want to tell Draco that they'd broken his trust. " … to Dumbledore."

" **_What_?"** He jumped to his feet, knocking the Gryffindor blanket down to the ground, his eyes searching the school grounds through the window. Draco hoped to find Hagrid still halfway there so that he could run out and stop him. The grounds were empty other then a few scattered pools of rainwater. " How could you?" He spun around to face Hermione again.

" Dumbledore has to know." Hermione said. " He'll make sure to protect you."

" Excuse me?" Draco mimicked her: " Protect _me_…" He scoffed. " Since when does Dumbledore give a hoot about the Malfoys? All he knows is that we're trouble. Why would he want to interfere? He rarely ever interferes with the personal life of his students!"

She stuck her tongue out at him, chiding herself inside for her childishness. " You know he does care."

" What do you think he'll do?" Draco sat himself down again, slouching horribly.

" Sit up straight." Hermione quoted her mother, then added: " I think Dumbledore might try to have you stay here over winter break. He can come up with some excuse about Quidditch, and extra practice for the Slytherin team." Hermione thought fast. " I know that would be the fist thing he'd do."

**__**

Only clouds will see  
Tears are in my eyes  
Empty like my heart  
Why do ya say goodbye

" Why?"

" When you'll return over break to your father, he'll want to continue the normal Malfoy family activities. We both know what I mean when I say _normal activities for the Malfoys." _Hermione thought hard. " Now, about the summer business…"

" You don't think I'd want to stay in Hogwarts all year, do you?" Draco raised his eyebrows.

Hermione snapped her fingers and her face brightened. " I know! You can say you want to spend the summer at a friend's house. You can stay anywhere if you'd like, after that. Do you have any friends with which you can stay without interference from your parents?"

Draco shook his head. " Only Crabbe and Goyle, and they live so close to me that my parents usually visit their parents every week."

**__**

Alone I can hear  
Hear our song  
Playing for me again

" That wouldn't work, then." Hermione suddenly felt her heartbeat increase. _Wouldn't it be weird if he stayed at my house…? _She stopped her thoughts. It wasn't going to happen. Draco would probably resume cutting his veins before he'd stay at Hermione's house for the summer, with Muggles.

Hermione hinted to him, anyway: " Isn't Pansy going away for the summer to Scotland? Some sort of Little Witches Summer Camp thing?" 

Draco nodded. " I don't see what that has to do with anything." 

" You could say you are going to Pansy's – and even I know she lives really far from here, so your parents can't visit – while you could really stay somewhere else." Hermione grinned.

" And what about Pansy?" He questioned.

" She'll never know; we'll never tell her. She is going away for the summer, after all." Hermione laughed. " You could book your entire two years of Hogwarts that way, cut yourself from your family like that."

" It won't work that long." Draco, the pessimist, grumbled.

" At least you'll get a mental break for the year." Hermione replied.

" One thing doesn't work out, though." Draco complained.

" What would that be?" 

" Where do I stay over the summer, then?" He looked saddened. " I wouldn't be able to tell anyone else in Slytherin I want to stay with them; they'll end up learning the plan. Pretty much all of Slytherin and their families are working for or with my father. My father would find out sooner or later."

Hermione felt nervous, her stomach fluttering with butterflies. In only a brief time, she had gone from despising Draco to feeling strangely close to him. _And he was so cute, too!_ She asked, nonchalantly: " Maybe you could stay at my house." Then, she stopped to see what his reaction would be.

Draco looked taken aback, then he said: " I suppose."
    
    " You mean it?" 

" Of course I do." Draco grinned. " You've done enough for me by now, anyway. Might as well slave away in a Muggle home for a while." He didn't seem too excited.

**__**

Maybe it's too late  
Maybe it's too late to try again  


Hermione folded her hands in her lap and then unfolded them, nervously. " I hope… I hope we'll become friends over the summer, then. I mean… you're not _that_ bad of a person, you know." Her smile wavered before becoming a very bright grin. " I think it would be fun."

**__**

Maybe I can pray  
Maybe I can wait

She didn't expect what was coming. Slowly, Draco Malfoy leaned forwards and kissed her.

A/N- Thank you for all your reviews! 


	7. It's never too late

A/n: This is Maggie again. I'm sorry for not updating but FanFiction.net was down for so long and Caroline's computer crashed, erasing the chapter. So I gotta rewrite it. Enjoy!

**__**

Chapter 7

She didn't expect what was coming. Slowly, Draco Malfoy leaned forwards and kissed her.

Hermione pulled away, fluttering her eyelashes nervously. Her mouth opened and then closed before she could speak: " I… I…"

He didn't speak anymore. His ears were a bright scarlet red and he couldn't have been able to speak even if he tried. Draco turned his head so he was facing the couch cushions and then ran his fingers up and down the faded old fabric in silence. Hermione's eyes shifted towards the doorway and she bit her lip expectantly. Dumbledore and Hagrid would arrive shortly.

" Thank you." Draco whispered. 

" You're welcome." Hermione's smile couldn't have been brighter.

~*~

__

It's just one more day  
No one said   
There would be rain again  
Won't blame it on myself  
I'll blame it on the weatherman  
Get away for a while  
Here I amount on my own again  
Won't blame it on myself   
I'll blame it on the weatherman  
~*~

Some time later, Hagrid and Dumbledore arrived at the little cottage. Hermione and Draco exchanged knowing glances as Dumbledore told them of their plan. Draco would spend the winter holidays at Hogwarts to keep himself away from his family's practices. Over the winter, Hermione knew she'd be seeing much more of Draco then usual. She decided to stay at school as well. Maybe she'd finally help Harry catch up with his Potions essay.

Dumbledore embraced Hermione's suggestion about how Draco should spend the summer at her house. He even began to write an elaborate letter of excuse to the Grangers, calling it a 'summer away' project from school, so that Draco's secret was well-kept. The so-called project from school required two people to be pitted together and then forced to spend the summer at either one or the other's house.

Hermione knew her parents, strict dentists, would not be too happy. Her mother might question the morality of having a boy and a girl as partners, while her father would have some say about Draco's slouch and chilly attitude. And, of course, her mother would have to put her two cents in as far as how Draco's cool beauty seemed very distant from the earthly, warm beauty that Hermione owned – olive complexion, brown hair, milk chocolate eyes. 

Walking towards Hogwarts, side by side, but at least a meter in between them, a couple yet not really, a pessimist and an optimist, the Gryffindor and Slytherin. Hermione couldn't help but smile to herself, thinking of winter break and the snowball fights that awaited them, or maybe a secret ambush on Ron in his usual snow fort near Hagrid's home. Draco, meanwhile, worried about what his father would think, what the other Slytherins would think, and worst of all, _what the heck am I thinking?_ seemed to cross his mind often.

The rain had faded away to form a dreary, muddled sky through which only a very thin patch of light escaped. The ground was wet, the grass left thin whip-like marks on their robes, and yet, something about the weather was foreboding, but in a good way. The next day, it would be sunny. Hermione just knew it.

__

It better be, Draco thought grimly.

~*~

__

Alone I can hear  
Hear our song  
Playing for me again  
Won't blame it on myself  
Just blame it on the weatherman

~*~

It truly was sunny the next morning. The day dried every tearful drop of rain outside, leaving behind weather-beaten, brown grass. Yet, over the winter, the grass would be coated with a white snow that would break it down and feed it to the earth. After a melancholy winter, spring would produce fresh green buds – a new life.

Draco's eyes weren't glossy with tears when he woke up, nor were they bloodshot for he hadn't slept all night. There wasn't a hole burnt through his pillow because of an unexpected fever (most likely a stress and migraine symptom). He checked his pulse to see if he hadn't died and gone to Heaven. He truly did feel good today.

Kicking back the covers and then looking out the window, his hands on the sun-warmed parapet, he knew that he, too, looked forwards to the breaking down of Draco Malfoy and the beginning of a new life. Though it would be one of just small saplings and beginner's growth, he'd have all summer to let himself grow inside. 

He stretched, his hands reaching upwards to the heavenly blue sky that was probably far above him. It didn't seem so out of reach now. The old blade he had hidden in his memory box under the bed wasn't nearly as important, his dried red streams of life still visible on the sharp edges. He hoped to forget it.

Turning back, his eyes seeing stars from looking so directly at the sun, he had one thing on his mind. _I wonder what Hermione's doing this evening…_

A/N- Thank you for all your reviews! 

A/N 2 - ^_~ This is the end, hopefully. I'll see what Caroline says, but I think this is acceptable enough.


	8. repaying it all

****

A/N- This is Caroline, sorry it took me so long, my computer broke.

A/N from Maggie- Caroline wanted to add ch.8… yay! Her pc is fixed up!  
  
Disclaimer- Duh, own no one.  
  
  
Draco slowly went into the great Hall, where the Slytherins were all waiting for him to tell his tale. But that's not what he wanted. _Where's Hermione? _  
  
Draco scanned the room, sitting down in his usual seat at the Slytherin table. Nobody would dare to take his seat, not after he beat a few kids up who did less then set a corner of their plate in his own area.

He was showered with questions, which could have easily driven someone mad. He simply ignored them, but they buzzed by his ears, slow and sliding by like the whispers of silk against skin.  
  
"Draco, where were you?"  
  
"Are you all right?"  
  
"Are you going to be all right, are you coming to classes tomarrow?"  
  
"Can I get you anything, Draco?"  
  
_Get away for a while  
Here I amout on my own again  
Won't blame it on myself _  
  
  
Just then Hermione walked in, she sat down across from Ron and Harry at Gryffindor table. Her eyes trailed to Draco, almost embarrassed, very unsure whether to acknowledge his presence. Draco, still somewhat embarrassed with himself, nodded very slightly to show he saw her and wished her a good day, but then he returned his gaze to his plate.  
  
"Oh, look, it's Mudblood Granger." said Pansy, glaring at her across the room.  
  
"Hey, don't call her that." Draco said, hoarsely. He couldn't understand his own voice, it just came out. "She sort of helped me out."

" Oh, really?" Pansy frowned. " Then go thank her, you baby!"

" Maybe I will go thank her." Draco said, angrily, and then stood, then headed to the Gryffindor table, where he sat down in the empty seat next to Hermione. The Slytherins and Gryffindors were now staring towards Draco and Hermione, almost expecting Draco to say it was a joke.

__

Standing on the shore  
Calling out your name  
I was here before  
I could see your face  
  
  
"What do you want here, Malfoy? Leave her alone." Ron said angrily.  
  
"Ron!" Hermione said, suddenly. " What, Draco?" She turned her head to him, almost expecting him to pull a trick. She knew that they had something between one another, but she wasn't sure whether he was really going to just come up to her in front of everyone for no reason at all.  
  
"Can I talk to you alone?" He asked.  
  
"Now?" asked Hermione, taken back.  
  
Draco nodded and they headed to the outside of the Hall. Draco wasn't about to go and talk to her aloud in front of everyone. He had to thank her in seclusion, so that the Slytherins wouldn't give him a hard time about it. After all, he owed a lot to Hermione, and he had to pay her back somehow.  
  
_Alone I can hear  
Hear our song  
Playing for me again  
Won't blame it on myself_  
  
  
The Hogwarts hallway was filled with students that were studying, kneeling or sitting Indian-style on the floor, books balanced in their laps. This wasn't a good place and time to discuss things with Hermione. Draco looked at her nervously, the Malfoy pride shining in his eyes like new shillings. Hermione shrugged and said, softly: "We can go outside."

He took the lead, keeping a humiliated step away from her. This was going to take some getting used to. Finally, they walked around the high wall outside the building and eventually ended up by the lake. Draco climbed up the rock by the waterside and held out his hand to Hermione. She took it gingerly and climbed up beside him.  
  
"Hermione, are you busy tonight?" He said, finally. " I was thinking that I'd take you to Hogsmeade, since tomorrow isn't a school day and all." He skipped a rock across the water. It didn't skip very far and his ears turned red. " I was… I mean, I need to pay you back. Somehow. I can't just do this all for free."  
  
Hermione was surprised by his words, since he had told her his secret, she figured he'd be a little shy around her. Then again, he was acting shy anyhow, but she judged from his words that he was making progress. She hadn't thought he'd want to involve himself with her any longer after getting everything out of his system to her.  
  
"Uh, Draco, I don't... I don't know what to say... I can't." She looked at her hands. Her capped fingernails had dirt beneath them. She suddenly realized that she should have cleaned them out after taking the Quidditch supplies the day before.  
  
"Just say yes. I can't have this hanging over my head." He spoke as if he couldn't care less about the date, but just the honor of it.   
  
"Yeah, sure, Draco." She shrugged, also nonchalant.  
  
"Really?!" He looked at her, not bothering to feign ignorance or nonchalance. He truly was happy. For a second, his face flickered to the dull, uptight grimace and he said: " I mean, that's good." Then, he laughed and did something odd. Draco threw his arms around her neck.  
  
Hermione cautiously patted his back. She hated to admit it but she felt comforted by his warmth. She felt safe.  
_  
Oh blame it on the weatherman_   
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Hermione climbed throught the portrait of the fat lady around midnight. The common room was nearly cleared with the exception of Ron and Harry.  
  
"Hermione!"  
  
"Hermione! Where were you?"  
  
Hermione, just smiled and sat down. It had been a wonderful night. Draco had taken her out to Hogsmeade, and after wonderful butter beer, they sat talking the whole night. They did have a couple things in common, a book they had read in their childhood, a similar and silly phobia of the dark, which they both laughed over. Draco had gone as far as sneaking into the kitchens and he emerged with desserts and two self-burning candles. At the end of the night, Draco had kissed her, but on the cheek, and then he turned very red and said: " Just because I'm happy that I paid back my debt to you." He didn't look as if he wanted to end his 'paying back' there, for he asked if she'd like to do it again.

Now, standing there, confronted with her best friends, she heard Harry say:  
  
"Don't tell me you had fun with Malfoy?"  
  
" Maybe." She said, putting on Malfoy's nonchalant face. Then, she burst out laughing, and Ron and Harry could never figure out what she meant.

  
**A/N- Please review!!  
  
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